Just a silly joke

Hoy mateys!

Do you know what kind of creatures secret agents like?

Spy-ders!!

lol

What is the fruitiest lesson?
History- because its full of dates

What side of a porcupine is the sharpest?

The outside! lol

Why was the tomato blushing?
Because he saw the salad dressing!

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

- How do you breathe through that thing?

:elephant: lol

Q: What is black and white and red all over?

A: A newspaper

OR

A: A sunburned penguin

Now for a gross one:

What is green and smells like bananas?

Monkey sick

Why did the one-handed man cross the road?
To get to the second hand shop.

I'm going to change it up and post up a long joke.

A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions.
"Sure," GOD says, "Go right ahead".
"OK," the man says. "Why did you make women so pretty?"
GOD says, "So you would like them."
"OK," the guy says. "But how come you made them so beautiful?"
"So you would LOVE them", GOD replies.
The man ponders a moment and then asks, "But why did you make them such airheads?"
GOD says, "So they would love you!"

Two Native Americans and an Irishman were walking through the woods.
All of a sudden one of the Native Americans ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave.

'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering,
'Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo!'
He then tore off his clothes and ran into the cave.

The Irishman was puzzled and asked the remaining Native American what it was all about.
'Was the other guy crazy or what?'

The Native American replied 'No, It is our custom during mating season when our men see a cave, they holler 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' into the opening. If they get an answer back, it means there's a beautiful squaw in there waiting for us.'

Just then they came upon another cave.
The second Native American ran up to the cave, stopped, and hollered,
'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!'
Immediately, there was the answer.
'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' from deep inside.

He also tore off his clothes and ran into the opening.

The Irishman wandered around in the woods alone for a while, and then spied a third large cave.
As he looked in amazement at the size of the huge opening, he was thinking,
'Hoo, man! Look at the size of this cave! It is bigger than those the Indians found.
There must be some really big, fine women in this cave!'

He stood in front of the opening and hollered with all his might
'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' Like the others, he then heard an answering call, 'WOOOOOOOOO, WOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOO!'
With a gleam in his eye and a smile on his face, he raced into the cave,tearing off his clothes as he ran.

The following day, the headline of the local newspaper read...............







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NAKED IRISHMAN RUN OVER BY TRAIN!!!